Christmas Re-Cap

Every year I say I will cut back on Christmas. And every year I fail miserably.

The boys were horribly spoiled by us, Santa, and extended family.

Among other things Tyson got a lot of Hot Wheels cars to go with the new dinosaur Hot Wheels set that Santa brought.

Here's Preston with several of his favorite toys: his MP3 player, his baby dinosaur, Elmo and candy.

The worst toy of the year goes to Giraffalaff Limbo. The toy itself is fine. It's actually pretty cute. The problem is that once it is assembled it no longer fits back in the box.

Obviously the toy designers are not moms. Is it too much to ask to either make the box bigger, or make the toy capable of being taken completely apart?

Grrrr

I was spoiled with a new digital camera. Santa did well, and gave me exactly the one I asked for. It's even red :) With only a little coercion, the boys sat still so I could "play" with my new toy.

And if that wasn't enough, Dan surprised the whole family with a new trampoline, which he assembled at 4am.

Now if Mother Nature would cooperate the boys could actually play on it.

Food!

Pregnancy brings many weird symptoms.

One of them is crazy dreams.

Typically, pregnancy dreams have something to do with the baby.

Not here.

My dreams have been about food!

I am embarrassed to admit that on Christmas Eve, when children are supposed to have "visions of sugarplums dance through their heads," I was dreaming about visiting the drive-thru at McDonald's.

The following night I had a lovely dream about ice cream.

Thanks to my neighbors I have a pile of Christmas goodies on my kitchen counter.

They make good between-meal snacks

(and bedtime snacks, and tide-me-over-until-the-frozen-burrito-in-the-microwave-is-done snacks.)

FYI: If you show up at my door with a hamburger and/or a milk shake you will be my best friend forever.

Merry Christmas

From Our Family to Yours

A Holiday Typo

Do you remember when you were a little kid. It seemed like Christmas would never come.

Well, at my house it's true.

Check out our countdown calendar.

My mother-in-law gave it to us for Christmas many years ago.

Each day Tyson excitedly moves the candy cane from one pocket to the next.

It works great, until you get to the last few days

That's right. 22,23,22.

Christmas Eve never comes!

Tyson had fun teasing his dad that today was the 22nd again.

I told Tyson that since today is the 22nd again, he had to go to school.

He didn't seem to mind.

I wonder if somewhere out there another family has a calendar with two 24ths.

We Were Just a Little Preoccupied

I gave Preston a puzzle to work on at the table while we baked Christmas treats.

An hour or so later I looked up to see this:

At least he had fun, right?!

Christmas Playlist

There is nothing quite like Christmas music to soothe your tired, grumpy soul.

Each year I enjoy discovering new Christmas songs.

I know many people like the old classics, but I need something new.

Last year my favorites included

Let it Be Christmas by Alan Jackson,

Believe by Josh Groban,

and

Mistletoe by Colbie Caillat

This year I've added

Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant

Ding Dong Merrily on High by Celtic Woman

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by Barenaked Ladies

Valley Winter Song by Fountains of Wayne

My playlist also includes holiday songs by

Sting

The Eagles

The Judds

NSync

Carrie Underwood

Josh Groban

and

Sarah McLauchlin

to name a few.

My boys have different taste.

Tyson's favorite song this year is the 12 Days of Christmas. He tries to sing it all day long.

Too bad he can't remember most of the words or what order to sing them in.

Preston loves Jingle Bells, which he calls "Bobtail Ring" half of the time and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, also known as "Baby Rudolph" around here.

What are you listening to?

Wordless Wednesday

Self Inflicted Chaos

Last week we moved Preston's bed into Tyson's bedroom officially making it

'The Big Boys Room'.

We need Preston's room for the new baby.

This is the last big transition before the baby comes in two months.

Part of me wanted to move Preston a month ago, and part of me has been dreading it.

I wanted to move him early so that I would have plenty of time to get the bedroom ready for a newborn again.

But

I have been dreading it because I knew it was going to completely mess with sleep schedules. Before the switch I could easily put both boys to bed in their own room and let them fall asleep on their own. Bedtime took 30 minutes, tops. Each room was set up to meet each boys' needs.

It was lovely.

Not anymore. Preston has forgotten that he is able to fall asleep on his own. He has also forgotten how to stay in bed. I've done my best at "Preston proofing" the room, yet Preston still finds ways of wreaking havoc when left in there alone. He is able to turn to the light on and off, he has started climbing the dresser to turn off the CD player, etc. He now takes 90+ minutes to put to bed at night. He isn't falling asleep at night until 10 pm or later. Yet, he is still the first person awake in the morning.

I am going crazy.

I am hoping he settles into this new routine soon because my patience is wearing thin.

Very, very thin.

Each day I learn from my mistakes and make adjustments.

(hiding stuffed animals that laugh and/or pray, adding and then removing the nightlight, increasing and decreasing the amount of time I stay with him, etc.)

Someday I will get it right, I hope.

Dads Are Just More Fun

After spending an hour away from home with my Activity Day girls

I was met by this sight:

Dan and the boys were happily working on their gingerbread house.

I was about to join them when I had a sobering thought.

They were having more fun without me.

I just knew if I joined them I would get uptight about how the house looked. I would have been worried about how smooth the frosting was applied, if the windows were straight, if the colored candies were applied in a eye pleasing pattern, etc.

I am a little too uptight (I'm blaming the pregnancy hormones) to make a gingerbread house with my children (and Dan) without elevating my blood pressure and/or getting mad at someone.

So I gracefully bowed out and let them have their fun.

And fun, is exactly what they had.

More candy went in their mouths and on the floor than actually made it onto the house.

They did it their way and had a great time doing it.

I'm pretty sure I made the right choice.

The house is cute and everyone is happy.

Bah Humbug

I don't know why, but I have been in a really bad mood lately.

I've been trying to figure out why I am a grump with no Christmas spirit.

Maybe it's the length of my To Do list.

Maybe it's how dirty my house has gotten while I've been trying to tackle my To Do list.

Maybe it's a lack of sleep.

Maybe it has something to do with the aggressive renovations this baby is making to my already weary body.

Maybe it has something to do with this cold that I've had for a month that just won't go away.

Or maybe, just maybe, it has something to do with a certain two year old and his constant, irrational, temper tantrums.

Pregnancy Update

28 Weeks

I am officially in my third trimester.

I am having trouble bending over, putting on socks and rolling over in bed.

The only thing I crave is chocolate.

My heartburn is alive and well.

I can't sleep comfortably without the aide of at least 4 or 5 pillows.

.

This little guy only accounts for about 2.5 of the 20lbs I've gained.

This baby is much more active that I remember Preston being. When he kicks, he kicks hard. And when he rolls over my whole belly shifts. For the most part it isn't painful yet and I am enjoying it. It's just a little annoying when I'm trying to sleep and he thinks it's time for a dance party. I am letting him enjoy it for now, because he is soon going to run out of room for handstands and Tai Kwan Do.

.

I have several Braxton Hicks contractions everyday (and have for a couple months now). Some are painful, some are not. Thankfully all this contracting has not had any effect on my cervix, so there's nothing to worry about. It's just annoying. I have decided that I just have a very irritable uterus. Everything sets it off. Standing up and bending over are common culprits.

I'm trying to get the boys ready for their new brother. I don't think Preston really gets it yet. I try to tell him that he is going to be a big brother, but he insists that Tyson is the big brother. I have successfully convinced him that he is no longer the baby though. If you call him a baby he will say, "No I baby. I a kid!" He did tell me that he has a baby in his tummy too.

.

I made the mistake of telling Tyson that the baby can hear him now. He likes to yell at my belly to try to make the baby move. It doesn't work. It just annoys me.

Wordless Wednesday

Adoption Questions Answered #3

Q: Do I prefer adoption over pregnancy or vice-versa?

A: After experiencing both, at least for me, they are

equal although very different.

.

If I had hard pregnancies or had a very difficult adoption my answer may be different. But from my own experience they both have their ups and their downs.

They are both painful and so amazing.

.

And both are totally worth it.

.

Adoption is a roller coaster with highs that are very high and lows that are very low.

It is exciting and special in so many ways. The road of adoption is filled with many monumental steps: the day your profile is approved, the day you are chosen, the face to face meeting with your child's birth mother and family, the day your child is born, placement, finalization, and your sealing day. All are a cause of great joy and excitement. An adopted child is also a bit of a novelty for friends and neighbors. I remember Tyson being treated like a celebrity in our neighborhood when he was a baby.

.

Adoption is also very hard. The approval process can be very demeaning. Proving to countless strangers that you are worthy to be a parent can be insulting and even embarrassing at times. It doesn't seem fair that adoptive parents must prove that they are healthy enough, they want a baby for the right reasons, that they have enough money to provide for a baby, that their marriage is strong enough, that they don't have a criminal background, etc. It is especially difficult when you see people around you who aren't healthy enough, who don't have enough money, who aren't in stable relationships, etc. be able to conceive quickly.

.

The adoption process robs you of your sense of control. Your desire to be a parent is at the mercy of other people. Not just the adoption agency and other professionals who declare you fit to be a parent, but the birth mothers as well. It's hard to know your life is on display for public viewing, your every word being scrutinized others. After you are chosen by a birth mother, she can change her mind at any time. You may feel as if you are walking on egg shells trying to say the right things, for fear that she will shatter your dreams of being a parent.

After placement, you must continue to prove to social workers that you love your child and are bonding well. And at the end of the trial period, you must declare to a judge that you love your child. And even after all this the world will qualify your child as your "adopted child" or say that you are not a "real mother".

.

But in the end it is all worth it.

.

Pregnancy has it's highs and it's lows as well, although they are not nearly as dramatic as adoption. It's is full of exciting days as well. The day you discover you are pregnant, announcing to family and friends, hearing your baby's heartbeat, having ultrasounds, feeling your baby move and kick, baby showers, doctor's appointments, the day your baby is born, bringing your baby home, etc. are all times of excitement. And lets not forget the special treatment from strangers when they see your expanding belly.

.

You never have to prove to anyone that you are the child's mother.

But in the middle of all the exciting days you also experience a loss of control. You lose control of your bodily functions, lose your appetite, lose your energy, lose your waistline and subsequently your wardrobe, etc.

.

Pregnancy is painful. Childbirth is painful. Recovery is painful.

.

But in the end it is all worth it.

.

I heard it once said that adoption is easier on your hormones,

and pregnancy is easier on your heart.

.

I love them both and consider myself very lucky to have experienced both.

I honestly hope I get to experience them both again.

Adoption Questions Answered #2

Q: Do I think Tyson will have issues being the only adopted child in our family?

A: Yes and No. I think issues will arise that we will have to deal with that a 'traditional' family wouldn't have to deal with. But no, I don't think he will have issues severe enough to warrant professional counseling.

...

Tyson asked to meet his birth mother as a result of seeing women in our family (including me) go through pregnancies. He understood the concept that babies grow in a mother's stomach, but knew that he didn't grow in mine. He felt a desire to find the woman whose stomach he did grow in. Once that need was satisfied he was at peace. Having a relationship with her was all he needed.

...

Tyson is already at the age where he understands adoption and asks a lot of questions. He has asked,

"Why don't I live with my birth mother?"

and

"Why didn't she keep me?"

I have been able to answer these questions with complete honesty. But there will come a time when my answers won't be good enough anymore. Then he will have to turn to either his birth mother or his Heavenly Father to answer his questions.

His adoption was her choice, and it was a part of His plan.

I know this.

Someday Tyson will have to come to that same realization for himself.

...

We like to celebrate Tyson's Adoption Day (which, ironically, is next week). We usually give him a small gift or do something fun as a family that day. I wonder how Preston and future biological children will feel, not having an adoption day (and sealing day) to celebrate. We will likely phase out the gifts and focus more on making it a special family day to spare hard feelings and lessen the difference between adopted and biological.

...

In short, we have always been honest with Tyson about his adoption. We try to focus on his adoption as an event in his life, rather than a part of his identity. I say, "Tyson was adopted," not "Tyson is adopted." My children are my children. I want them to all feel loved and accepted for who they are. We focus on our love as a family, instead of our differences.

...

And, who knows, maybe Tyson won't be our only adopted child.

We don't know what our future holds.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I am thankful for:

A loving Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, the gospel, my life, Dan, Tyson, Preston, our new baby, my extended family, my in-laws, the temple, good friends, my home, food on the table, clothes to wear, Dan's jobs, freedom, food storage, talents, love, kindness, an education, good neighbors, sleep, chocolate, my car, my camera, my computer, phones, microwaves, my vacuum, pillows, good health, medicine, doctors, health insurance, books, sunshine, snow, rain, crunchy leaves, grass, flowers, time, memories, hope, happiness, forgiveness, soap, pie, holidays, lotion, Chapstick, hugs, laughter, jeans, flip flops, mountains . . . . .

What are you thankful for?

Wordless Wednesday

Adoption Questions Answered #1

Q: Do I feel a different connection with Tyson than I do with Preston. (Not do I love one more than the other, but do I feel a different type of connection)?

A: I have thought long and hard about this question. It has really stuck with me. It's interesting because I only have two children, one is adopted and one is biological. I love them in different ways.

Are the differences due to individual personality and age or are they due to the way they came to me?

When this question was first asked to me Preston was still a baby. At the time I felt a stronger connection to him. Was it because he was my flesh and blood? As he has grown I have noticed that connection change and become more like the connection I have with Tyson.

Here's my hypothesis: A mother will typically have a stronger connection with a baby than with an older child due to a motherly instinct to care and protect a helpless infant. As a child grows and no longer relies on a parent for constant care and protection the bond between parent and child weakens.

Does that make sense?

I am still very self-conscious about this. I am always monitoring the way I parent them. Am I more lenient with one or the other? Do I favor one over the other? I never want them to wonder if I was playing favorites.

I think having a third child will help.

Instead of it being Tyson vs. Preston it will be the big boys vs. the baby.

Prestonspeak

Preston is quite the talker - if you can understand him.

He speaks very well for a two year old boy, BUT he doesn't speak clearly enough yet to hold a conversation with someone outside the family, at least not without the assistance of a translator. Tyson and I can understand him 95% of the time, and I'm pretty sure my parents and sisters can understand him 75% of the time (granted these are completely made up statistics.)

For the rest of you, here's a little help:

He often puts the word "no" at the beginning of a sentence, rather than in the middle.

For example "No I want milk" means "I don't want milk."

This can cause problems when I can't tell the difference between

"No I want Daddy!"

and

"No, I want Daddy!"

He confuses "put on" with "take off."

So he says, "Mom, take on my shoes please."

or

"I put off my hat."

He also likes to add the word 'am' to lots of sentence. For example, he often says,

"I am want a cookie." or "I am need a drink."

I personally love it when he says,

"I am like Sheeby."

And if you think he's cute when he talks, you should see him run!

Our Vaca - Sunny SoCal - Part Three

Day #7 Lego Land

Dan and I took the boys to Lego Land as our last day of fun before our vacation ended. We had a great day. The park wasn't crowded and there were no lines for any of the rides. I was able to ride a few kiddie rides with the boys, and Dan was more than happy to take Tyson on all the roller coasters, multiple times. Tyson must be my son because the Test Track was his favorite ride of the day.

(Dan and Tyson on the Test Track)

Preston thought seeing Bob the Builder was pretty cool.

And surprisingly, Tyson was a little nervous.

Day #8 On the Road Again

We all piled back into the cars and began our long drive home. We were all anxious to be home. While driving we learned that there was a blizzard at "Home Sweet Home." We weren't too fazed by the news until we learned that I-15 had been closed due to the storm. We reluctantly got a couple hotel rooms for the night, and attempted to get some sleep with 7 of us piled into one room.

Day #9 Are We There Yet?

We were up and checked out of the hotel well before the sun came up to continue our trek home. We watched the thermostat in the car with morbid fascination as it dropped as low as -5 degrees. Thank heaven for heated seats! I was thankful we waited till daylight as we navigated the icy road home. We arrived home in time for Dan to go to church while the rest of us stayed in our sweats for the rest of the day.

Our Vaca - Sunny SoCal - Part Two

Day #4 Let the 'Fun' Begin

After two relaxing days we decided to have some fun.

We got up early and went to Sea World.

I'm ashamed to admit that Tyson, my ocean life fanatic, had never been to Sea World before.

His only time seeing a real whale was in Oregon when we saw the tail of a grey whale.

Taking him to Sea World was one of the highlights of this trip for me.

As we were standing in line outside the gate, I started to feel a little light headed. I wasn't feeling that great to begin with, but I was faking it for the sake of the group. I quickly made my way to a nearby bench while Dan paid for our tickets. I started to feel better after sitting for a few minutes so I joined the group at the turnstile as we got ready to enter the park. I again felt light headed but this time I didn't make it to a bench.

I remember saying, "I need to sit down now" as I grabbed Dan's arm and lowered myself to the ground.

Things went dark for a minute as I heard someone call for a wheelchair. When I re-gained my bearings there were several park officials hovering over me. They helped me into a wheelchair and took me off the the First Aid trailer to be checked out. After a quick assessment of my vitals we discovered that I had a low grade fever, my blood pressure was very low and my blood sugar was low as well. The first EMT was sure I had H1N1 and because I am pregnant he wanted to rush me to the hospital in an ambulance. He was convinced I was going to die in a matter of hours.

I knew I wasn't that sick and I was NOT going to miss being in Sea World with Tyson. Dan and Sheeby gave me a blessing and we were able to convince a second EMT that I only had a cold since the boys had colds and they were the ones who got me sick.

They pumped me full of an electrolyte drink and let me take a nap. Two hours and a slice of cheesecake later, I was feeling much better.

Still very weak, but much better.

They offered me a wheelchair saying that if I passed out again on Sea World property they would be taking me to the hospital whether I liked it or not. I happily took the wheelchair.

We met up with our group.

Thankfully my family had made sure the boys had a good time in my absence.

My sister even took pictures for me.

Here's Tyson with the manatees (my all time favorite animal). She took several pictures, trying to get a good picture of Tyson.

By the time he smiled nicely, the manatee swam away.

The highlight of the day (at least for me) was the Shamu show. I was thankful for my big dark sunglasses as I teared up thinking of Tyson seeing Killer whales for the first time.

Yes, I am an emotional pregnant woman.

By the end of the night I was ready for bed.

Even riding in a wheelchair all day was exhausting

(and a pain in my pregnant tailbone.)

Day #5 More Fun, Less Drama

I wasn't about to spend another day sitting in a wheelchair, so my family went to the San Diego Zoo without me.

Dan did well to take pictures for me.

And he made sure Preston saw plenty of turtles.

They also enjoyed seeing elephants, tigers, hippos, and giraffes.

If you want more details of their trip to the zoo, you will have to ask them.

I spent my day relaxing and doing laundry.

Day #6 Oceanside, Lazy Style

We took another 'down' day.

Some people went shopping on the boardwalk and ate Fish and Chips.

Some people went to the beach and fell in the ocean.

Some people visited the Farmer's market.

I didn't do any of those things.

By the evening I finally worked up enough energy to visit the Sunset Market which is a weekly occurrence in Oceanside.

We enjoyed walking around the vendor's tents, listening to the live music and eating.

Tyson's crepe

Sheeby's churro

(Stay tuned for Part Three tomorrow or maybe Thursday)